Tuesday, January 7, 2014

The hero I shall never be - 1

Food is the language I speak. To myself and to the world. To everyone I love. It's the only language I can speak, in fact.
The passion for cooking does not reside in my heart. It runs with my blood, supplying life force to all my components.
How can I explain what cooking means to me? The magic that manifests in my kitchen when aromas flirt with one another, dancing away into a state of coexistence. The climax that concludes the entire drama of flavors, hues and tastes. As a child I'd always wonder where I'd find my salvation - in my cooking or in the smiles of those served.
Yes, I have inherited a large part of the passion. My ancestors have run the most famous restaurant in my hill city. I never needed to join a culinary school; I graduated at my own home at a young age. But I thank god, my parents never let me easy on education. I wonder what I would be today had I not spent my formative adult years in Delhi. What would have I become had I not chosen to do my final thesis on food safety? I would have known so much less about the poison lingering in our food produce and manufactured products. I wouldn't have spent sleepless nights trying to patch up the divinity of food with the toxicity of food. I wouldn't have met Mrs Das whose NGO showed me the way as I travelled across the country strengthening my understanding of the problem and my conviction for finding a solution.
That I spent the following years meeting people as passionate as myself was something just meant to be. That I did not end up as a chef at my beloved family restaurant has to be a fortunate accident. As it all granted my lust for food so much more nobility. I could pursue one of the best courses in agriculture management. And I could gather unprecedented exposure working with one of the largest food trading firms in the world.
Within the next few years, I had developed a deep longing to free food from the blot it had acquired on its purity. It had to become beautiful again. I wanted to clear its conscience. And I knew it was an endless task.
My efforts on reviving organic farming methods in my hills and on using harmless technology for food storage would have been futile had I not received the support and love of my community. I was the child of a restaurant that, in the words of my people, was "a pride of the holy hills". Had I been a nobody to them, would my requests be considered? I am not so sure.
My love for food, as you can sense, will never die. But so hasn't my desire for change. A few hills have been conquered, yet the worlds beyond them await a rescue.

There is something about the magic that manifests in my kitchen when aromas flirt with one another, dancing away into a state of coexistence. And climax that concludes the entire drama of flavors, hues and tastes.
I have finally found my salvation - in reviving the divinity of food.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Melody

From the corner of my eye
Falls a wet shapeless being
Away from the sights of the world beyond
Unknown, Unheard, Unseen
My heart withers today
As I hear that old melody again
The one that had disappeared
in the dance of our first rain
I can't believe fall's already here
And it looks like it's here to remain
As the world swears by my bright hues
I silently dry up inside
I dance in pain for one more time
As I play that old melody again

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Beyond my veil

Beyond my veil is an alien world- one that can change me forever. More often than I would like to admit, it forays into my fantasies and entices me towards it. It lures me to run away from this prison that I call life. Aah, but they say that foreign world is sinful. So I hold back my steps.
But how could I ever hold back my thoughts. I fancy riding a bike on a hilly terrain, the cool breeze hitting my face. I think of climbing up the trees and devouring half-ripened mangoes, just like my brothers do. I wish to jump half-naked into the village pond, let my bare skin soak the waters of freedom. I dream of dancing in the fields for the joy of first rains. I want to bless my life with all that they call sinful.

If only I could!


Tuesday, May 10, 2011

An Ordeal

"Long time no see", said a smiling face.
Emerged out of nowhere it was he, right in front of me.
What was he even doing here - in my world, in my life that he had ruthlessly abandoned long back??
Did he want to destroy all that I had built over the years? Did he want my life to be miserable again? The innocence and genuineness in his eyes did not hint so.
And why the hell do you think we should see each other at all??, I stared at him tacitly. I bet he would have recognized that question in my eyes - he must have observed that a zillion times before.

Because there is no reason why we shouldn't, he beamed again, forcing me to feel embarrassed.

I somehow managed to escape his presence. Turning to my friends, I began cracking jokes and having panipuris. That's what I had come to the fair for. For a few minutes I had forgotten about that encounter completely. But then I noticed him scrutinizing me as our paths crossed yet again. I wanted to run away from that moment. It was so unreal, so undesirable. I had no idea why I felt so distinctly insecure and disturbed in his presence. I kept wondering. For what seemed like hours. Until I sensed a soft peck on my cheeks and inhaled a well-known, comforting essence. And in a blink appeared my sweetheart with the smile that accessorizes my life. I got up and buried my face in his chest, hiding the small tear of guilt that rolled down my eye. I held him tight, wanting to live that moment - One that was so real, so desirable.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Just Another Relationship..

When people talked about love washing away with time, I thought that happened with people. It couldn't happen to us ever, I thought. We made such a unique relationship.
But I was young and stupid then. Couples are couples afterall. All relationships have graphs with pretty much the same trends. How did I come to believe that we were outliers? No don't get me wrong. I still see that soulmate in you. Your voice soothes my heart. But, now, retaining that interest level in me seems to be an effort from your side. The one who loved to care for me is apparently trying to care for me. Or may be, you always tried to. I saw what I wished to.
Before it's too late.. Before I'm too possessed by my dreams.. I need to wake up and realize that life with you isn't going to be that rosy afterall. You'll eventually get sick of me. And I'll begin to complain. And we'll live normally ever after..

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

The Fall

The colors have begun to change. From lively shades of green to bright shades of orange. And it's like a dream. To watch the nature change bit by bit, day by day. Eventually, there'll be no greens at all. I'm so looking forward to that time.
Is it a sadistic wish? To look forward to the flora dying all around me? Or may be it's like craving for the KFC burgers, despite knowing the naked truth. Depends upon the perspective.
But the thing with a fall season is: The beauty it imparts to the leaves just before they fall off. Their last chance to rejoice over their changed colors. The sense that it provides to us: We will all have our share of falls and springs. It's cyclic.

Nothing dies.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Things I'll never say...

It's the minutest of things in life that matter the most to me, you know. Your little gestures deeply touch my heart. The way you...

..Cup my head with your palm in reaction to my frequent frowns.

..Stroke the back of my fingers with yours, casually.

..Hold my shoulder gently and pull me towards you until I rest on your chest.

It hypnotizes me. Overwelms me to the core.
I wonder how I will digest all the happiness that still awaits us.
The joy of your company.. The pride of being yours.. The sense of being one with you forever...